rhinestonecowboy

i should start using tags here. awawa.

Dear Diary:
I like fighting games. Watching other people play them fills me with a level of determination that has yet to be rivaled. Lil Majin and SonicFox are a couple of my favorites. Listening to IFCYipes on commentary has had me laugh to the point of tears on multiple occasions. The fucking hype live events EVO are able to gather into one room is palpable, even from years-old recordings. The characters, the combos, the storytelling built up over hundreds of matches. I think I actually really fucking love fighting games.

Now. I, myself, already own quite a few fighting games. I'm not very good at them.

I wish to change this. I want to get good at fighting games.

The main thing impeding me in the challenge is candidly myself. I have something of an ego and being good at something requires you to first be bad at something. Fighting games, by nature, force you to first be absolutely doodoo butter dogshit at something. Publicly. And that creates a level of vulnerability that I am Not Okay(TM) with showing just yet. I do not know how I will get over this. But I will. I must. For my own sake.

CoHost is blowing up and I still don't have any honktrap to show for it. Shit sucks. Here's my aunt Mack's ANZAC biscuit recipe. Never tried it. I should do that one of these days.
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Alright, kids. Gather 'round and shut your yaps, 'cause it's time for an exciting recipe from your Aunt Mack. ANZAC biscuits. You're going to get about 18-20 biscuits out of this.

Preheat your oven to 175°C (or 350°F if you're weird) and get the rest of this shit together:

1 Cup each of Flour, Oats and Sugar.
3/4 Cup of dried Coconut flakes.
110g of Butter.
2 Tablespoons of Golden Syrup. Any runny honey will do in its place, or a light molasses, but use a 'real' product.
2 Tablespoons of boiling water.
1 Teaspoon of Baking Soda.

That's it.

1.) In a big-ass bowl, put the flour, oats, sugar and coconut.

2.) Over a low heat in a saucepan or bowl, melt the butter. Stir the syrup or honey into this mix.

3.) Drop a couple tablespoons of boiling water into a mug, then stir in the baking soda. It'll fizz.

4.) Stir the baking soda into the butter mix until it's a fizzy, creamy yellow colour. It doesn't need to be creamed, but that's the colour you want to see.

5.) Mix the butter sauce into the dry ingredients. Use your hands, it's fun! It'll be slightly crumbly, but very sticky.

6.) Roll up little balls to fit roughly in your palm. Slightly smaller than golf balls - these are going to spread a lot on the tray when the ingredients settle and melt, so smaller is better. Don't worry if the mix doesn't hold together perfectly; once the sugar melts, you'll be fine.

7.) Put the balls on a sheet of baking paper on a tray and pop them in the oven. Bake for about 18-20 minutes, then let 'em cool. They should end up a nice light golden colour as the ingredients melt together and the sugar starts to caramelize - if you see them turning brown in the oven, shut that shit off and pull them out.

Your biscuits are done. There's no eggs, no milk, no complicated mixing or measuring. It's just 'everything in a pot and fucking wham, stir!' When rolling the mix into balls, you might find it easier if you have slightly damp hands; damp palm, not soaking wet, just enough that the mix will slide around a little and not stick to your hand. Your first few biscuits are going to be a mess, but don't worry. The meltification process (that's sciencetific) will bring even the most busted-ass ball of mix together into biscuit form.

As one final note, if you find that the biscuits stay quite high and thick, next time around just put a little more syrup or butter in there. While they bake, they should settle to a couple centimeters thick. They'll taste just as good if they're thicker, but they're supposed to be thin and CRONCHY - they're biscuits, not cookies.